In the beginning, God created actors. And for a long time, everything in the universe was at peace. God was very pleased with His creation and the actors were pleased with the bountiful inspiration around them and their inner creativity. After awhile, the actors began to become very obnoxious and full of themselves and God realized that He had made a mistake.

Not long after these actors had become terrible creatures, God created techies. He gifted them with everything the actors lacked: they were resourceful, down to earth, outgoing, friendly, and incredibly good looking. Not to mention that they could get the job done. God commanded that the actors and the techies worked together for the sake of the universe as well as His peace of mind.

Many actors became angry with the techies, believing that God would cease to pay attention to them now that His new creations came around. These bitter actors scorned the techies and pushed them out into the wings. A few kind-hearted actors became close with the techies, spawning a new breed collectively known as techtors. Though neither admits it, techtors usually have the best characteristics of both worlds. But that story is neither here nor there.

Gradually, the techies grew used to being in the wings and came to relish in the darkness and anonymity. The actors realized this and grew angrier and began to practically ignore the techies all together. The techies’ feelings were very hurt by this, as they felt that it took both actors and techies to make the world go ‘round and they went to talk to God.

God listened with sympathy at the techies’ plight and became saddened. “My children,” He said, “I am afraid that there is nothing I can do to change how the actors treat you. I gave them free will and by making them treat you with respect they do not feel, I am forcing something upon them.” The techies understood this, but they were still hurt. “Is there anything I can do to make you feel any better?” He asked.

The techies thought about this for a while; what could God give them after He had given them a lot already? Finally one spoke out: “We would like a holy place,” she said. “A place where only we may enter and find peace and comfort.”

Another spoke: “We would like it to be filled with wood, luan, and screws!”

And another: “We would like it to have many power tools, extension cords, outlets and still have room to move!”

Yet another spoke: “We would like to have enough paint to cover all the walls three inches deep!”

God smiled and granted their request. The techie haven was born on that day, with all that they desired and more. It became known as the tech shop and actors were warned never to set foot into it upon penalty of beating with a sledgehammer.

And again, things became balanced with this universe as a whole. But more importantly, God’s peace of mind was restored.

The End
(I apologize to any this offends, I was just trying to have some fun.)